Posted by WIRED on Thursday, March 15, 2018 10:28:37It’s a strange world out there.
If you want to make friends with people, you have to be careful, says Laura Crenshaw, a sociologist at Emory University who has studied how people interact with strangers online.
If they’re socially awkward, that can make them less receptive to socializing, she says.
Social distance and isolation, in other words, can be dangerous.
When people who are socially isolated are able to socialize, they often have less conflict with strangers.
If we isolate ourselves from the people around us, we’re more likely to feel isolated, Crenshews research found.
Social distancing is a tool used by people who need to avoid social interaction to stay focused and focused on work, study participants reported.
If someone you’re working with gets on your nerves, you might be tempted to ignore them, says David Mays, a social distancing expert and the cofounder of the online networking site Meetup.org.
But if you’re a part of a team, that might be the best option, Mays says.
In other words: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, get back to work.
If not, you can be more confident in your abilities to meet and work with people and can even start to connect with people again.
The only problem with this strategy is that it can be a trap, says Crenshaws research.
“If you isolate yourself from your friends and family, you’re going to feel that way,” she says, and it may be difficult to adjust to new social environments.
Social Distancing TipsTo stay focused on what you’re doing, be selective and selective with whom you socialize with, says R.K. Moshiri, a professor at the University of Southern California and the author of the book, Social Distancing.
If people are looking for a social companion, make sure you’re not sharing a space with strangers, he says.
If possible, be sure you are in a group, rather than a single person.
When you’re with others, don’t say “Hello,” or try to take their attention away from your own.
Be aware of how your behavior could make others feel uncomfortable.
If there are strangers nearby, be more cautious about talking to them or asking for directions.
If someone you know is a stranger, be mindful that there are social rules about how you interact with others and your presence.
You may have to make some concessions, such as making eye contact, and there are certain rules about when you can socialize.
If your interactions with strangers aren’t consistent with your expectations, ask yourself, “Am I being too friendly?
Am I not being respectful?”
And, “Do I need to make it clear what I mean?”
To avoid being seen as overly friendly, if you meet someone and they seem uncomfortable, you should either: Don’t touch them, talk to them about their problems, or explain yourself.
If you’re uncomfortable or suspicious, you may want to: Make it clear that you’re being honest and helpful.
Don’t start a conversation.
Explain that you have a problem with their behavior and they need to be more careful.
If the problem isn’t obvious, explain that you feel like you’ve been misinterpreting what you’ve said or the way you’ve acted.
If it’s obvious, say you need to talk to the person.
If that’s the only option, say that you’d prefer not to social with them.
If another person is involved, offer to help them find a way to connect.
If they’re still not interested, offer them a way out.
Say you’re leaving.
If no one is interested, give the other person the option to leave.
If a stranger offers to help, you could say, “Thank you,” or you could offer to meet up with them at another time.
If it turns out that they aren’t interested in meeting up with you, it’s time to talk.
Offer to meet at a place you both agree on and have them make a note of where they agreed to meet.
If both parties agree to meet, ask for their names and addresses and say that it was the first time you talked.
If neither party says “no,” then it’s best to call it off.